Update: Stroke of Grace has become In Darkness Sing and has moved to JenniferSaake.com.

Thirty-nine-year-old Jennifer Saake (founder, Hannah's Prayer Ministries), experienced 6 strokes via vertebral dissection at a chiropractic office, including brain stem and cerebellum bleeds, in Oct. 2011. Jenni remained hospitalized for nearly 2 months and was not expected to live (near death experience) nor recover, but if she even survived, she was slated to live out her days in a nursing home or, best case, to maybe come home but wheelchair-bound and needing 24-hour care. At 5 years, 7 months God showed how He was writing her story from the beginning.

Jenni is currently writing more books and stays active on both Facebook and Pinterest. Stroke of Grace became In Darkness Sing in early 2018 and has moved, along with all five of Jennifer's active blogs, to one location at JenniferSaake.com.

Since Jenni's chiropractor carried no insurance and moved out of the country soon after the accident (thus avoiding any legal or financial consequences), if you would like to help contribute to the Saake (pronounced like the two small words, say and key) family's massive financial needs (medical expenses alone are estimated to cost between $1- and $1.5- Million in Jenni's lifetime), please visit Jennifer Saake's Stroke Survivor GoFundMe Page. (This support information has been added in direct response to several reader requests.) The Saakes sincerely thank you for your prayers and if God prompts and equips you to send any monetary assistance as well, this is a significant added blessing.

Friday, May 18, 2012

Two Brains

I started out the morning as a crying, screaming, emotional mess! Poor Rick! I do this several times a week, sometimes several times a day. My worst PMS didn't hold a candle to my current outbursts, my sweet Rick always the target for some reason I can't explain beyond the fact the I am the more emotionally transparent with him than I am with anyone else, so I feel safe and relaxed enough to fully let my guard down when I'm with him. Unfortunately for him, being comfortable enough to be totally real around him comes at a very high cost! Anyone would be overwhelmed after so many months of such brutal verbal onslaught. :( Most folks don't believe I can be so ugly, but let me tell you, it is the truth!

I described to Rick that I feel as if I have two brains, my rational "writing" and reasoning side and my out-of-control emotional one. I can usually think clearly, problem solve and make plans, but none of this matters (especially when I try to organize my thoughts enough to hold an intelligent conversation, trying to verbalize anything on my heart) when the emotional, and often irrational, side takes over, as it often does when I try to share my heart with anyone, especially my beloved groom. This is so overwhelming and painful to us both! Too often it feels that the emotional brain is winning.

On a totally different topic, I forgot to say that Wednesday my neurologist said something that really encouraged me. He said I was very driven and a go-getter and there was no reason to "kick my butt" like had had to do to try to motivate "most" other patients. I just had to record this before I forgot what he said. To any people in positions of power or care given, please never under-estimate the potential power of even your most casual words.

Verse of the day:
When I said, “My foot is slipping," your love, O Lord, supported me.
When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought joy to my soul.

Psalm 94:18-19

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