I kept telling folks, "I thought I would be walking by now." I know of at least two doctors and a therapist who thought I would never walk again, but somehow I still felt "behind the curve" because it was taking so long.
Finally, yesterday, Rick heard me lament yet again and he told me, that a doctor had called him into the hall early in my hospitalization and told him that I would be fortunate to be walking again after two years!
Load off my mind! Somehow, the difference between "never" and medical personnel giving hope that maybe I could walk again, but it could take a very long while, no longer makes me feel so much stress, so much pressure, to prove them wrong and do so in record time. Instead of feeling anxious that my birthday is coming up next month (my own goal for walking) and I'm still far from reaching that goal, I can keep pushing forward while realizing that even if I'm not walking by the following birthday, I'm still doing better than the one best medical expectation. With that knowledge, the stress I had been putting on my own shoulders, in this area, melted away a bit.
On a related note, I tried wearing some flat sandals out to dinner last night, because I wanted something prettier with my sundress than the big bulky tennis shoes I have been wearing. When I couldn't even make it down the hall from our bedroom to the kitchen, I realized the change in footwear would never work for an hour or so, outside the house. I changed back to my tennis shoes, thankful for God's and Rick's provision of safe, supportive shoes that Rick bough me after I came home from the hospital!
And I am certain that God, who began the good work within you, will continue His work until it is finally finished on the day when Christ Jesus returns.A friend sent me these verses, based on my prayer request yesterday morning. Thank you for your prayers. There have been a few tears today, but I am doing better than I have the last couple of mornings:
- Philippians 1:6
Evening, morning and noon I cry out in distress, and he hears my voice.
But I will sing of your strength, in the morning I will sing of your love; for you are my fortress, my refuge in times of trouble.
But I cry to you for help, LORD; in the morning my prayer comes before you.
2 Corinthians 12:9
But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 4:7
But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.