|My walker, Bubbles.|
Service started out well. We attend a church with two services, a "traditional" one with old hymns and mostly elderly attendees, and a "contemporary" later service with louder, faster praise music accompanied with electric drums and guitars, populated mostly by our peers. We actually go to the early service specifically to avoid the neuro stimulation of second service (and our kids are some of the only young in attendance, so are blessed with many "grandparents").
Today, however, we had special music at offertory that was beautiful, but LOUD and accompanied by drums. I was digging for my ear plugs (though I am mostly deaf in my left ear, what I do hear is not easily processed by my brain, thus this is the ear I must plug against loud noises), but even so, was in physical pain at some of the crescendo points. Within moments, I had to excuse myself to the restroom. I was sick all through service, then we came home without staying for Sunday School as usual.
I slept for 4 hours! I woke up about each hour. After hour one, I had a headache added to nausea and realized, while all the vomiting, light sensitivity and sound sensitivity were like severe migraine symptoms, the headache itself was the result of sleeping with my entire body so tightly clenched into a tight fetal position. I was, however, finally able to move my head enough to look at the clock without "spinning out". By hour two nausea was still pretty strong but my muscles were starting to relax and be abler to spread out a little, even roll onto one side. By hour 3, headache and nausea were both significantly improving, muscles were loose enough to fully uncurl and stretch out in bed, even roll over onto my tummy, but I felt as done in, fatigued, limp, as a wet dishrag. After the 4th hour of sleep, nausea was down enough I felt I could risk moving again, so I got up and sat in my recliner for the next couple of hours. I guess I was quite pale when I woke up but reclaimed more color over that next couple of hours sitting upright.
I never managed any lunch, so after keeping down two glasses of chamomile tea and a dose of Zofran (nausea med), we went out for a light dinner. I'm now home, in bed for the night, before 7PM.
As I was throwing up, I was thinking about how if I were to just give up and stay home, I would never have days like this, never encounter latex, loud sounds or other triggers beyond my control, Truly I have (now) many more good days than really rough, like the first year or two! (No wonder I was so depressed when this was daily expectation!) So when days like this hit, they are evidence that I haven't given up, keep trying, keep risking, an out living.